START: My name’s David Dean. I work in t...

Jerusalem

Davey Dean

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START: My name’s David Dean. I work in the abattoir. Get there six in the morning — hungover, hazmat suit, goggles — and I stand there and I slay two hundred cows. Wham. Next contestant.

[... ... ...]

END: But whatever you change your name to, you’re still f*^&#$! Lee Piper; and wherever you go in this world, when you get off the plane, boat, train, or crawl out of the jungle smeared in paint, the bloke waiting to meet you is also called Lee Piper. Make paper. Make more paper. Shag on.

For full monologue please see Butterworth, Jez, Jerusalem, NHB Modern Plays, 2009.

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