START: Elizabeth and Donald are now too...

START: Elizabeth and Donald are now too happy to be able to hear me. I can therefore let you in on a secret. Elizabeth is not Elizabeth, Donald is not Donald. And here is the proof: the child that Donald spoke of is not Elizabeth’s daughter, they are not the same person.

[... … …]

END: Who has any interest in prolonging this confusion? I don’t know. Let’s try not to know. Let’s leave things as they are. (She takes several steps towards the door, then returns and says to the audience:) My real name is Sherlock Holmes.

For full monologue, please refer to the clip or the script edition cited here: Ionesco, Eugène, The Bald Soprano & Other Plays, “The Bald Soprano”, Grover Press, 1958, p. 19.