Start: A luxury item is a thing that yo...

WASP

Dad

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Start:

A luxury item is a thing that you have that annoys other people that you have it. Like our very green lawn. That’s a luxury item. Oh, it could be less green, I suppose; but that’s not what it’s about.

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End:

But I was wondering several years ago, and unfortunately never really got around to asking you until now, I was wondering, what do you plan to do with your life?

For the full monologue, refer to the clips or script edition cited here: Steve Martin. “WASP,” in Picasso at the Lapin Agile and Other Plays. Grove Press, 1996. pp.128-129.

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