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Start: This was my last day of work. We...

Crumpet

The Santaland Diaries

Joe Mantello David Sedaris

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Character
Gender
Male
Playing Age
Adult
Style
Comedic
Act/Scene
Act One, Scene One,
Time & Place
Macy’s Department Store, New York City, 1980s, 1990s
Length
Medium
Time Period
Contemporary
Show Type
Play
Age Guidance
Thirteen Plus (PG-13)

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Text

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Start: This was my last day of work. We had been told that Christmas Eve would be slow but this was the busiest I’d ever seen it, the chaos a week’s worth of training had prepared us for -- twenty-three thousand desperate people behaving as though they were trying to board the last train out of town.

[... ... ...]

End: Many elves complained but the rest of us found ourselves in the moment we’d been waiting for. It was us against them, time to be a trouper and I surrendered completely.

For full extended monologue, please refer to clips or the script edition cited here: Mantello, Joe, and Sedaris, David. The Santaland Diaries. Dramatists Play Service, New York, NY. 1998. p. 32.

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