BELLA You're not going to school — to...

BELLA

You're not going to school — today. Trust Bella. First, a girl's got to learn the American Way. Do you know what that means?

Marguerite shakes her head.

BELLA

America isn't like France. It's a world unto itself, a new world that's all future and no past. And the people... Americans are a bunch of upstarts and outlaws who thumb their noses at tradition and do things their own way — and that's the American Way.

MARGUERITE

Papa says Americans lack discernment.

BELLA

(chuckling)

The man's entitled to his opinion.

MARGUERITE

What means discernment?

BELLA

It's something snooty people claim to have that others don't. Snooty people are jackasses. But back to the American Way...

(taking a folded map from her satchel)

I've created a curriculum, a roving curriculum. The city streets will be our classroom. Today, we will visit Horn and Hardart, the automat, to study American feeding habits. Then on to Ripley's Believe It or Not museum, where we will observe Americans' fascination with the bizarre and perverse. Followed by Radio City Music Hall, home of the Rockettes, a shameful example of the objectification of women. Tomorrow, we'll visit Coney Island, a hotbed of capitalist pleasure-seeking and escapism. After that, the Village, to study Bohemian life amid creeping materialism. And finally, 42nd Street, the apocalypse waiting to happen. Any questions?

MARGUERITE

What about the day after tomorrow?

BELLA

Is there something YOU'd like to add to the curriculum?

MARGUERITE

Church. I want to see your American God.

BELLA

Your American God! Hold on, I've got him right here in my purse.

(extracting a dollar bill from her satchel and holding it taut before the girl's eyes)

There's your American God, shayna maydela. Ugly little pisher, isn't he?

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