DIANE: Recognize me? No? God of agricult...

DIANE: Recognize me? No? God of agriculture, wine and song? It’s cool, it's been a while.

I’ve been called by many names - Bacchus, Bromis, Dionysus. I was born thousands of years ago - sprang fully formed from my father’s thigh, crossed the foamy seas of Aegan to Asia Minor, then traveled on foot down into Thrace, hunting and reveling and bringing ruin to those who doubted me.

[... … …]

Once my first unit is activated, I’ll take off like a wildfire, spreading out across the heartland, the fruited plains. Bringing live, frenzied, Bacchic realness to Main Street, America. Before you know it, we’ll be knocking at your door.

Nervous? Don’t be. It’s going to be okay. It’s going to feel amazing to save the world.

For full extended monologue, please refer to clips or the script edition cited here: Madeleine George, Hurricane Diane, Concord Theatricals, 2017, pp. 9-12.