How am I feeling going into tonight’s ma...

How am I feeling going into tonight’s match with Luke Legend? (Bigger.) How am I feeling going into tonight’s match with Luke Legend?!? Pretty damn under-appreciated, TJ! Night after night I go out into the squared circle and I give the people what they want. It doesn’t matter if it’s a chair shot to the body or a cheese grater to the face; I always make sure there’s enough carnage to leave everyone satisfied! And I’m not complaining! Hey, I’d do it for free! But I can’t help noticing that for my efforts, I am never awarded a shot at the title! Not one time! Instead, I have to watch an Adonis-looking gentleman by the name of “Heartthrob,” flaunt the belt like it’s his dad’s car! Look, we all know the real reason I’m not the number one contender. It’s because I’m ugly! You want people like Heartthrob, TJ! Beautiful people, with rock-hard abs and movie-star smiles! That’s what everybody pays to see! You won’t put me with him because you’re afraid of what I’d do to him. And I’d do some wonderful things too! Some horrible things! To his face, most of all!

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