Hi, it’s me, Nellie. Thanks so much to...

e-baby

Nellie

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Hi, it’s me, Nellie. Thanks so much to all those who are following me and for all your hugs and prayers.

She positions the camera to show her belly.

...which have been answered. Yay! Three heartbeats!!

She holds up three fingers and makes a stunned face.

I’m calling them the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost! Just kidding.

SFX of kids playing. She turns around and calls out.

Hey, you two – no hitting! That’s my gorgeous kids – gorgeous when they’re not trying to kill each other.

SFX kids arguing and whining escalates. She speaks a little louder.

I’ve gotta have ultrasounds every week now – and so many needles! When we first found out about the triplets, I was in total shock. But things happen for a reason.

I was gonna get “we’re preggo” printed on M & Ms.

But in the end...I couldn’t wait.

There are two sacs - one with identical twins and one with a fraternal. All the heartbeats are fine.

My IM is beyond excited. I’m totally pampered. She’s sending a cleaner for the first trimester. I love it.

SFX kids arguing and one crying. She looks around, distracted.

Hang on.

She turns to look behind her, calling to the boys.

Ya gotta share!.

What would Jesus do?!

_She tries to refocus on the vlog. _

I even got a manicure. My IM’s working from her New York office whenever she can now, so she can come to the all the ultrasounds.

SFX: kids squabbling gets louder. She turns and puts her fingers to her lips, then returns her attention to the computer.

These babies are a real miracle, coz my IM’s eggs are a bit well...geriatric.

So...I really want to inspire you guys and tell you there’s always hope – even when the statistics say the opposite.

God is working in your life right now for things you can’t even imagine.

Screaming escalates again. She frowns and turns around and calls out.

Give it back - now!

She returns to the screen.

Phew! Sorry. Where was I?

_Something falls. There is a scream. _

(To the YouTube community.) Hang on.

She marches off stage and comes back with a toy. More SFX screaming.

(She calls out.) You can have it back when you stop fighting!

_She puts the toy on her lap and soldiers on with the blog. _

I can’t wait till the next ultrasound. Catherine’s gonna meet me in New York again.

SFX: Squabbling ebbs and then starts again.

(To the kids.) Wait!!!

(To YouTube.) Sorry! Mike...I mean DH, was a bit funny...I guess because he’s been missing out...if you know what I mean.

I’ve promised him a 64-inch telly with the extra money I get from multiples. Sweeten him up!

She checks her watch.

He’s at college till eight. He’s gone back part time. Accounting. Boring!

Which reminds me, there was big wait at the clinic today coz the doctor was held up with a delivery, so we all sat around telling jokes.

Screaming escalates, as does her voice.

This is my favourite: Why does it take 50 million sperm to fertilize one egg? Beat.

Because they won't ask for directions!

She gets up and faces stage left as the screaming continues.

Kids!!!

She looks up for inspiration.

Anger lodges in the bosom of fools. Ecclesiastes. 7.9

She adjusts her t-shirt, hoists her breasts into place and smiles a gritted teeth I-will-be patient-smile, and marches off to the boys.

All monologues are property and copyright of their owners. Monologues are presented on StageAgent for educational purposes only.

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All monologues are property and copyright of their owners. Monologues are presented on StageAgent for educational purposes only.