The Dean: Ha! ha! I am glad, really glad...

Dandy Dick

The Very Rev. Augustin Jedd

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The Dean: Ha! ha! I am glad, really glad, children, that you have broken through a reserve which has exited on this point for at least a fortnight — and babbled for money.

[Salome & Sheba: (Laughing with delight) Ha! ha!]

The Dean: It gives me the opportunity of meeting your demands with candour. Children, I have love for you, solicitude for you, but — I have no spare cash for anybody.

[Salome: (To herself) Lost!

Sheba: (To herself) Done for!]

The Dean: And now you have so cheerily opened the subject, let me tell you with equal good humour (emphatically flourishing the bills) that this sort of thing must stop. Your dressmaker’s bill is shocking; your milliner gives an analytical record of the feverish beatings of the hot pulse of fashion; your general draper blows a rancorous blast which would bring dismay to the stoutest heart. Let me for once peal out a deep paternal bass to your childish treble and say emphatically — I’ve had enough of it!

Pinero, Arthur Wing, Dandy Dick, Oberon Books Ltd., 2012, pp. 25-26.

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