MR. MENDELEV Hello, everyone. I’m your...

MR. MENDELEV

Hello, everyone. I’m your science teacher and head judge, Mr. Mendelev.

MS. McGERY

And I’m Ms. McGery, your school drama teacher and head assistant head judge. I was asked to help out today and bring some dramatic flair to the otherwise drab world of science!

MR. MENDELEV

I think science can be very exciting and dramatic, Ms. McGery.

MS. McGERY

And I’m so glad I could show you that. Let’s announce the winners! In third place, Bobby Frindle, with his baking soda volcano!

Everyone applauds.

MR. MENDELEV

In second place, Suzy Meyers, with her display: “Chemistry Gone Wrong: the unsettling science of Lunch Lady Linda’s chocolate cherry chimichangas.” Truly chilling stuff, Suzy.

MS. McGERY

And in first place…

MILEY steps forward, ready to accept her reward.

McGERY/MENDELEV

Tyler!!!

MILEY is stunned. TYLER is triumphant.

TYLER

Thank you all! I’d like to dedicate this award to my parents, who make me feel as bright and shiny as my favorite planet: the sun!

MILEY

The sun isn’t a planet! It’s a star!

MS. McGERY

Miley, dear, try not to be a sore loser. Did you see Skimbleshanks throwing a fit when he didn’t win the Jellicle Ball in Cats?

MILEY

I didn’t see Cats.

MS. McGERY

Well, don’t be a sore loser about that, either.

MILEY

But I deserve to win! This is the equation for the day the asteroid hit earth and wiped out the dinosaurs! It’s a breakthrough in the field of quantum physics - and it’s not even my biggest breakthrough!

MR. MENDELEV

Miley....that’s a piece of notebook paper.

MS. McGERY

And I know this isn’t really my place to say, but next time, you might want to take off the little Squigglies

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