MAN2: We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming for these ridiculous jokes...jokes? Sure, we'll call them jokes.

WOMAN2: What is it with everyone going hairless? Like, we're mammals, people...these advertisements for laser hair removal are driving me crazy. I like my hair and I like hair, on men. When I see hairless men at the beach, I think: little boy. I need a man, a hairy man with a snarl. Kind of like a Wookiee who speaks English.

MAN1: You know you've hit a new low when you're eating rum cake for breakfast. It's cake, so you know you're depressed, but you're consuming the cake for the alcohol too, which I suppose is a more respectable way to start day drinking.

WOMAN1: You know you have a solid marriage when you can describe your bowel movements, and your partner is