Lights rise on a cramped bachelor’s bedroom. A pile of coats on the bed. A party rages in the next room. After a moment, the door swings open and Philip, 29, pushes a scantily clad Lorelei, 24, through the door and shuts it behind them. They look at each other for a moment.

Lorelei: What?

Philip: What??

Lorelei: What?

Philip: What? What?... What the f##k, that’s what.

Lorelei: What are you doing here?

Philip: What am I doing here?

Lorelei: How was the movie?

Philip: What movie?

Lorelei: The movie.

Philip: Oh come on, I just—… On the list of transgressions, okay? I just—, it’s my cousin’s bachelor party. You’re not supposed to tell your girlfriend—

Lorelei: I wouldn’t have minded—

Philip: Clearly. How long has this been going on?

Lorelei: What?

Philip: The—… How long have we been