Anything Goes

ACT ONE

The action opens in a smoky bar in Manhattan. Elisha J. Whitney, a Wall Street tycoon, is enjoying his seventh drink while waiting for his assistant, Billy Crocker. He tells the bartender, Fred, that he is headed to London in the morning to “boot the Yale boat home” at the Henley Regatta, an annual rowing event on the Thames. Billy enters, and Eli immediately begins singing the Yale Fight Song while Billy stands at attention. Whitney chastises Billy his tardiness; Billy explains that he was “taking care of business” and pulls out Whitney’s steamer ticket, UK currency, a train ticket up to Henley and a stuffed bulldog wearing a Yale sweater. He’s forgotten Eli’s passport, but reassures him that he’ll get it to him in the morning. Eli says he wants Billy down at Wall Street in the morning to sell all his shares of Amalgamated Petroleum; he’s gotten an insider tip from an old Yale friend.

Fred hands Eli “one for the road” (a bottle of gin) and Eli exits. Billy asks Fred if