Col WHERE IS HE?! Stan I’m sorry? Co...

Don Juan in Soho

Stan Col

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Col WHERE IS HE?!

Stan I’m sorry?

Col Is he here? He must be here!

Stan Well he’s not!

Col senses a lie. His eyes wander to the jar of nuts...

Col Are they from a mini—bar? Did you stay here last night?

[... …]

Col You’re nothing but a fly on a horse’s shitey arse! I and my brother will be the tail that smites the fly. And the horse too!

Stan Oh, be gone — and take your terrible metaphors with you!

Col (exiting) I’m coming back!

Stan calls after him.

Stan I’ll deny everything! You’ve no proof!

Patrick Marber, Don Juan in Soho. Faber & Faber, 2017.

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