CRISPIN — … What about a quiz? Everybody...

3 Steps to Heaven

Crispin Simon Janet Tania

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CRISPIN — … What about a quiz? Everybody loves a quiz. The Funky Monkey Lodge & Spa quizzes are legendary, aren’t they, Tania?

TANIA — If by legendary, you mean non-existent, then yes.

JANET — Ooh, I love a quiz. Go on, Crispin, ask me anything. Anything at all.

SIMON — Oh, God, here we go.

CRISPIN — Uh, okay. Um … name me a famous Arthur.

JANET — (BEAT) CHARLES DICKENS! Go on, go on, ask me another.

CRISPIN — Uh, okay. Um … Name me a mythical creature that was half-man, half-bull.

JANET — (BEAT) BUFFALO BILL! Ooh, I’m on a roll, Crispin, ask me another.

CRISPIN — Uh, okay. Um … Can you name me the five continents?

JANET — (BEAT) A, E, I, O & U!

CRISPIN — Right, maybe not a quiz then. Oh, you’re going to love this. I’m sure I saw some board games in a cupboard somewhere. (EXITS)

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